its been far away from me. not as in that holiday... but the personal spirit.. at least in my perspective..
christmas eve.. used to be my whole dining room FILLED entirely with Christmas cards.. now.. it hardly takes up one wall side.. are we jus forgotten? or has the mailman replaced it each time for the last past years.
used to spend it with both family on both sides.. now. its so hard for me to remembeR. and even if i did go. its all different.. now.
im not being overreactive. i dont cry easy. i cry on what really earns the teaRs. but i cry on an empty floor. no one in distance. its to faR away.
i dont want a ride. gifts are the last priority.. although it would be nice i want my family.. on what it was made to be
Check #1 - Support my family. Make improvements in where I live now.. not going away to Hollywood and building a house there kinda deal. Id rather be respectful on how I lived then just moving on to a new lifestyle because of the money.
Give - money to those i can give directly. not that random charity give.. but a more meaningful act of generousity when i see one in need.. ill spare that dollar...
Check #2 - Buy some cars! -smart cars, personal cars, family cars..! including insurance, and the usual car touch up, and makeup.
Making sure theres always pounds full enough to eat on the table for d fam. Groceries! Shopping!
your nothing but ridiculous your mind sets oblivious.. youhavent stepped into reality but choose anothers'tragedy your fucked up in the head son
a P P R E C I A T E addictions is the only force that makes you contempt with your weak, unnessisary needs your selfish. an abuser. addictions is your only hope.
B e L i V E adulthood stamped you but reality went by as 17.....16...........13.....12.....11....10..... trapped. never stumbling upon.... "havent i left anything behind?" "isnt this enought" "i should make a change for the betteR" evidentually jealous is addictions your only hope?
i N F L U E N CE of lives you dictate over.. choose over...destroy over your hypocritical the relationships that fail because of you but no wake up call on your part because .. your satisfaction is what only addictions alone can satify. what is family? where is the love? what is reality? who have you left behind? how is this impacting you? are your satisfied now , sir? addictions- is your only hope...
i N Th E L o N g r U N
its your own curse. you decide what really matters what couldve been yourlife... wake up. it might be TOO late.
-A basketball. It was more than a everyday (seasonably reasonable) hobby and I was never the kind of girl that would of choose a doll, or something girlie type.. I saw a difference in me and other girls that I would know that thought I was crazy for picking a basketball over, for say, American Girl dolls. Now reflecting back on that, it shows that women are just as the same as men and can sure break that sterotypical lead some people view women as.
